On Depth Psychology and "New Age" Spirituality

As a healer/therapist (and, admittedly, one who might be said to embrace a "metaphysical" paradigm of thought), I have been thinking a great deal lately about the relationship between what I am going to call depth psychology (think Jung, shadow self, integration) and "New Age" spiritual teachings (think Law of Attraction, Abundance, Manifestation).

For years, I was steeped in the depth psychology side of the equation. While I was interested in and curious about concepts like "our thoughts create our reality" and the virtues of positivity, it all felt a bit too "light" somehow-- like it couldn't possibly be the whole picture. I had more faith in the grittiness of deeper work-- of really trying to be present with all the facets of what I was carrying. (And, let's face it-- some of that material wasn't light and/or breezy!) 

For a time, I had a friend who was avidly devouring books about the Law of Attraction and Cosmic Ordering, and she had no interest whatsoever in therapy. "The past is the past," she would tell me. "It just creates discord to unearth that stuff. I'm trying to stay positive." In other words, digging deep was going to cramp her style; her manifestation efforts would go to hell.  Or so she thought.

The curious thing was that, as far as I could tell, her life seemed like kind of a mess. She wasn't holding jobs. She couldn't decide what to do about school. She "attracted" men who treated her poorly. Suffice to say that this was a woman who appeared to be running from herself. 

Meanwhile, I was hanging out in the trenches of therapy. I was on a mission-- and it involved going head-to-head with the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly. My unofficial mantra probably went something like this: "Authenticity or Die." Now, in the end, that endeavor served me quite well as it provided an essential foundation from which to launch a more whole Self out into the world.  But I'm not going to lie-- there's a way to get stuck on that side of the equation as well. (More on that in a bit.)

Something that I have come to understand is that, while there is, in fact, great truth in many of the "New Age" teachings my friend was so fascinated by, one cannot "attract" the ideal from a broken place. Denial of our pain and our shadow selves only creates a distortion in our energy field, which then gets transmitted out into the Universe. In other words, in order for us to manifest true soul desires, the inner and outer worlds need to be in alignment. All of the positive affirmations on the planet will never stand in for the painstaking inner work of true integration.

Writer and spiritual teacher Jeff Brown says it beautifully:

The universe responds to authentic transformation-- nothing feigned will do. If our positive thinking is incongruent with our emotional reality, if we have not done the real work to ready ourselves for humanifestation, then our wishes will fall on deaf ears, falling to the bottom of the fountain with the rest of the pennies. We need to get our emotional world consistent with our "positive thinking" in order for our requests and visualizations to be taken seriously by the “Universal Broadcasting System." If we are all blocked up with pain and anger, our "positive thoughts" will not be authentically sourced and organically positive. The more emotionally unresolved we are, the denser the message we transmit.

Perhaps this all sounds like some grand therapy initiative. And depending on where you find yourself with regard to the (im)balance I'm talking about, I suppose it could be. But, as I said earlier, there is certainly room to get stuck (as I did!) on the other side of the spectrum-- the side that, at times, glorifies the grit and downplays the grace; the side that, in spite of itself, is unwittingly addicted to the wounded aspects of Self and the "struggle" for wholeness at all costs.

The other day I logged onto Facebook, where another of my favorite writers/spiritual teachers, Oriah Mountain Dreamer, had posted a blog entry entitled "Spiritual Wincing." Her concern was with "harsh admonishments disguised as spiritual truth" (i.e. "Let it go," "Accept and move on," "Think positively" etc.). Such slogans, she asserted, trivialize the deeper challenges of the human heart, and indicate a lack of  faith in how we are made. Her offering was beautifully-written and, like everything she conceives, full of an undeniable wisdom. Yet, at the same time, I found myself wondering about the other side-- about the times when such "superficialities" might be, in fact, necessary and even legitimate...especially if we are prone to overstaying our welcome in the heavy stuff. Some of us need to push ourselves to authentically engage with our shadows; to honestly attend to our deepest pain and sorrow. And, conversely, some of us need a "tough love" reminder about when it might be time to come back to the world of the living. In the end, I do think that it can be just as "safe" to stay groping in the half-light of broken space as it can be to cheerlead those positive affirmations from on high.

I've recently come to discover that there is something inherently vulnerable about learning to see in the Light. But this vulnerability doesn't come from any form of spiritual or psychological bypass-- it comes from building a deeply integrated foundation. Sure, there are times when it can be easier to hide from ourselves by not venturing to look very far beneath the surface. And, alternatively, there are times when it can be easier to stay mired in our own "muck." Ultimately, though, as with everything in the Universe, it's about a harmonizing of opposing forces.

May you hold that paradox.

Life Purpose and Our "Rejected Stone"

As we herald in the unofficial start of summer, it might seem sort of odd to entertain the ponderous weight of something as massive as “Life Purpose.” After all, we often think of summer as the season to “check out” and go on vacation; to take a break from all of the heavy lifting. But the Cosmic Forces That Be clearly have something else in mind.
 
I’ve started a bit of a trend; last month, prior to writing, I did a reading that highlighted a particular flower essence whose healing properties were especially relevant to a poignant issue in the collective. Partly out of my own curiosity (and partly to help you!), I did the same again this month.
 
What came up was an essence called Silver Princess. Silver Princess is native to Australia and is an exquisite and rare member of the Eucalyptus family. It is said to bring about an awareness of Life Purpose, though not necessarily all at once. It is often indicated for those at a crossroads, showing them what the next step on their path might be. It is also helpful for those who may know, more globally, what they are here to do, but who are hanging in question as to the next concrete action step.
 
Oftentimes we know more than we think we do when it comes to matters of the soul. We’re just really good at coming up with a million “rational” reasons why what we want is impossible or futile. Thus, the most important work we can do right now is to listen; to quiet the noise and the naysaying voices and to find the space that is eternal, ever-present and always in approval.
 
This work of companioning ourselves is hard. While the proliferation of New Age thinking might suggest otherwise, the conscious life is a practice. Just like yoga. And sometimes we have to sit in “poses” that arouse discomfort in their revealing. This may be one such phase for you. Trust that there is valuable information here.
 
This morning I came across a quote from The Gospel of Thomas. It says, “Show me the stone which the builders have rejected. That one is the cornerstone.” As you sit in discernment about how to move next, I encourage you to consider the possibility that your most radiant gift might not, in this moment, look glistening and polished. Embrace it anyway.
 
In flower essence therapy there is a principle called The Doctrine Of Signatures. It maintains that the physical properties and circumstances of the plant are emblematic of the imbalance that it seeks to restore. Silver Princess is a very rare and beautiful strand of the Eucalyptus tree; it grows in a remote region of Australia and takes great effort to find and cull. In fact, one might accidentally bypass it for this very reason.
 
Such is the case with our own greatest treasures. We may overlook them; or we not even see them, because we didn’t dare to venture far enough out. Or to look under the right rock (incidentally, Silver Princess grows on Boyagin Rock, a granite outcrop in southwestern Australia. We think of rock, of course, as being inhospitable to growth, but it is the heartiest plants that bloom in the most unsuspecting places, after all.)
 
If you feel yourself at a crossroads of purpose this month, perhaps take some time to consider your own “rejected stone.” It might surprise you. And it might just light a spark in the collective, too.

Are You In It For The Cure?

We are at a critical juncture. I don’t mean for that to sound scary; it actually has the potential to be very exciting. But, as one of my dearest mentors has been saying, this is going to be a month of Choice Points. How it all goes down is really up to you.
 
This past week the following Anthony DeMello quote made its way into my field of awareness: "Most people tell you they want to get out of kindergarten, but don't believe them. Don't believe them! All they want you to do is to mend their broken toys. ‘Give me back my wife. Give me back my job. Give me back my money. Give me back my reputation, my success.’ This is what they want; they want their toys replaced. That's all. Even the best psychologist will tell you that, that people don't really want to be cured. What they want is relief; a cure is painful."
 
I’m in the business of curing, although sometimes I get folks who are more interested in relief. Let me be clear about something: we’re getting to an evolutionary point where there is essentially no such thing as “relief” anymore. As a planet we simply cannot afford it. The Universe has upped the ante and is asking us to do the same. If we’re not in it for the “cure,” we’re going to have a rough ride from here on out.
 
Here’s the deal, as raw and real as I can put it: If you’ve been in troubleshooting mode, guarding against what’s swimming underneath those pesky symptoms, the jig is up. It’s time to do the hardest work of your life.
 
But don’t take my word for it. Consider your world right now. More than likely, you are being confronted with some kind of major trial or transition. It might or might not be an outer crucible; either way, there is a deep internal recalibration going on in the collective. This inner shift will eventually have some kind of impact within the outer world. For example, a realignment of values might lead to a change of job, relationship, or purpose.
 
Everyone’s “test” will look a little different. Perhaps you are making a career change. Or leaving a relationship. Or getting ready to start a family. Or perhaps you’re in the midst of a deeply disorienting spiritual awakening and you have no idea, yet, what the implications of that will be in your life. Or maybe you’ve hit a wall with a partner or family member and are being asked to reconfigure the relationship along completely different lines. No matter. The crucial thing is that you’re fully in whatever it is, facing it head on, and inviting everything – the good, the bad, and the ugly – to the table.
 
Easier said than done, that bringing-it-all-to-the-table stuff. When we’re up against our most seemingly intractable issues, resistance will come to the fore, sometimes with a vengeance. It’s human nature to run like hell when we meet our edge. We will find every excuse in the book to not do the work. We don’t have time. We need to save money. We don’t think anyone or anything can help. And the list goes on.
 
If there’s one thing that is of vital importance right now, it’s this: don’t let yourself off the hook (you definitely want to beat the Universe to this!). Be ruthlessly honest about where you’re running. Pause. Take a breath. Allow the resistance to be there. And then find a way to kindly dig in in spite of it.
 
Conscious work is not “easy breezy.” While sometimes it can feel that way for a while, especially when the process is still new and exciting, there comes a point where our core wounds and deepest issues demand attention. This is usually the point where the work “loses its luster” and we fail to be as enamored as we once were. But this is actually a sign that we’re touching down in the deep. If you’re someone who has bolted at this juncture, I invite (and compassionately challenge) you to get back on track.
 
The major Choice Point lies in essentially this question: Will you continue to seek “relief” (if that’s what’s been motivating you to this point) or will you step up to the work of curing?